I halve a spelling checker,
It came with my pea see.
It plainly marks four my revue
Mistakes I dew knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong ...Read More

2006: I will read at least 20 good books a year.
2007: I will read at least 10 books a year.
2008: I will read 5 books a year.
2009: I will finish Dan Brown's 'The Lost Synbol'
2010: I will read ...Read More

- You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.

- You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

- You call your son's beeper to let him know that it is time to eat. He emails you back ...Read More

A police car pulled me over near the high school where I teach. As the officer asked for my license and registration, my students began to drive past. Some honked their horns, others hooted, and still others stopped to ...Read More

I was at a stop light, behind a car with a bumper sticker that said "Honk if you love Jesus."

So I honked. The driver leaned out his window, gave me an very impolite gesture, and yelled, "Can't you see the light is ...Read More

When two women (Aidy Bryant, Kate McKinnon) stumble upon Themyscira, they're surprised to learn its inhabitants (Gal Gadot, Leslie Jones, Melissa Villaseñor, Heidi Gardner) are not what they expected.