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Q: For Lent, I decided to embrace Pope Leo’s suggestion that we should disarm our language, avoiding harsh words and rash judgment. I am not Catholic; I am Italian Methodist, which, according to someone in the Diocese of Denver, is pretty much the same thing. Anyway, I know good papal advice when I hear it, so up until Sunday I was doing pretty good following the pope’s admonition. Then, near the end of a seven-hour drive to see a new job site in Iowa, a moron attempted to merge onto the freeway in front of me and ruined my spiritual journey. At first I did not know the driver was an idiot. I assumed he had at least basic driving skills, but I was wrong. As a good Christian motorist, I slowed down to let the imbecile merge. He immediately slowed down. So I slowed down more, and he slowed down some more. Some people just can’t take a hint. Before you knew it harsh words were flying out of my mouth. (On a technicality I don’t think I judged him rashly as evidenced by his inferior driving abilities, but still, I should have done better). I remain a work in progress. – (From Fish)

A: To my dear friend, Fish, In our travels through our wounded world, it is inevitable that we will encounter many of our co-earthlings who (in the language of my friend, Don Imus) “are not traveling with their seat backs in their fully upright and locked position.” Our choice when we encounter them is to engage them or escape from them. Escape is by far the safest and most ethical option. The key to escaping the morons of the world is to consider every insult against you to be a small insult and every insult you cause to others to be a large insult. This is good advice and very good karma.

Q: Rabbi Gellman, I would like to share my thoughts about Lent. Yes, it is tradition to fast from something. That fast should be from something that is keeping us from being our best. The fast should be paired with an act of giving. For example, you could fast from TV and use that time to call or visit or help someone who is lonely. The hope of Lent is that by trying to change one thing that hardens your heart you might become a kinder person and closer to God. If you can change this for 40 days maybe you can change forever? I had a good friend who also knew Fr. Hartman. He wrote a book for Lenten prayer. In it he says Lent is a time for fasting and a time for feasting. Fast from discontent, anger, bitterness, selfishness, despair, laziness. Feast on gratitude, forgiveness, compassion, hope, truth, patience and God's mercy. So I will fast from angry words and feast on better listening and kindness. – ( From M in Rocky Point, NY)

A: Dear M, you got it! You have seen that there is a natural link between fasting and giving. By giving we acknowledge that all the world is God’s and that what we have is merely lent to us. We return to the world what we did not own anyway.

Q: Good morning, Rabbi, To me, Lent is more about giving than giving up. The money I save by not drinking wine I GIVE to my church. I have a Lenten study guide that I work with every day. Thank you for asking and have a wonderful day! – (From A)

A: Dear A, you have discovered the essence of Lent. “Lent is more about giving than giving up.” God bless your pious and joyful soul.

Q: I am an atheist, but I was brought up in a German/Swedish/Lutheran home.

The only one interested in giving up anything for Lent was my father, the son of German immigrants; he wanted us to abstain from meat on Good Friday. I think his parents did that when he was growing up, and he felt it important to honor the custom. So we always did. But when he died, I said to my mother, "Break out the hamburger!" And we never gave up anything for Lent from that day forward! – (From N)

A: Dear N, there are reasons for customs. They are actions that turn us to the good. I pray that some day you might discover this.

Q: On Friday, February 20, I read with great interest your article about a message from Fr. Tom that was given through a person who did not know your father‘s name. It was the evening I was planning to light a memorial candle for my father. My father‘s name was Sol. – (From P)

A: So, P, the psychic ripples of Tommy’s appearance after his death have spread everywhere!

(Send ALL QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS to The God Squad via email at godsquadquestion@aol.com. Rabbi Gellman is the author of several books, including “Religion for Dummies,” co-written with Fr. Tom Hartman. Also, the new God Squad podcast is now available.)

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