Life Advice
/Health
/ArcaMax
Help! My Teen Nephew Wants To, Like, Talk To Me
DEAR MISS MANNERS: How do I kindly tell my sister that her son's texts to the family are annoying?
He's 14, and his texts and phone etiquette leave us scratching our heads. He doesn't "read the room," often sending gifs and memes more appropriate for his friends than a family chat that includes his mom, aunts and grandparents. Or he will call ...Read more
Blindsided by Wife's Betrayal
Dear Annie: Three months ago, I came home from lunch and my wife had packed up her closet and said: "I'm sorry, but I'm no longer in love with you. I'm bored and lonely, and I'm moving out."
We have been together 33 years and married 32 years. It was devastating to say the least. Since then, we have spent some time together going to the gym ...Read more
Relative Threatens To Reveal Victim's Devastating Secret
DEAR ABBY: I was raped by a family member and, due to special circumstances, told no one except one other family member, who I swore to secrecy. She recently got mad at me because of my religious beliefs, and now she's saying if I pass away before she does, she's going to tell my grown children who assaulted me.
I'm praying she said it out of ...Read more
Asking Eric: Feuding siblings trap mediator sister in the middle
Dear Eric: I have always been close with my only siblings, my twin sister (67) and our brother (72). But sis and bro have had many issues over the past few years and bro chooses to distance himself from her. I feel like I've always been the family matriarch and arbitrator.
Bro is now in a seniors' home with virtually no funds to speak of. His ...Read more
Man Wants To Reconcile, Leaving Ex Conflicted
DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend broke up with me two weeks ago, and it left me feeling heartbroken and confused. He said he wasn't sure about our relationship anymore, and while he didn't give a lot of specifics, it was clear he had doubts. I've spent the past few weeks trying to process everything, feeling sad and wondering what went wrong. Then, ...Read more
Email 101: Assume Everything Will Be Forwarded
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm a member of several organizations. Frequently I've sent updates or comments to the leaders of these groups, who then forward my email to everyone with their reply.
Do I need to put a "for your eyes only" disclaimer on each email? That seems a bit stiff, but my emails aren't necessarily for publication!
GENTLE READER: ...Read more
When Father's Vision Doesn't Match Your Own
Dear Annie: I am 36 years old, and I recently spoke to my dad. He raised me, and we have always been like best friends until I moved to Virginia, just because of the distance.
I have an older sister who lives at home and doesn't care to work, and my dad basically raises her son. I told my dad my future ambitions to adopt a child, and his ...Read more
Daughter Uses Father's Guilt To Suit Her Needs And Wants
DEAR ABBY: I've been in a relationship with a man for the last five years. "Julian" came into my life after my husband passed. He is 65; I'm 45. Julian has two grown daughters, 36 and 27. The older one and I get along famously.
Amber is somewhat immature. She has two small kids, and she's her dad's perfect, precious, can-do-no-wrong daughter. ...Read more
Single File: Mirage for 2
DEAR SUSAN: I've been writing to a man on an online dating service for four months. We're both single, and he seems to know I'm hung up on him. But now he says he doesn't want to write to me as often as before. He says writing to me isn't fun anymore! What can I do to let him know how much I care for him? -- Clara
DEAR CLARA: Four months does ...Read more
Asking Eric: Husband won’t let kids have friends over inside the house
Dear Eric: My husband has told our kids they cannot have any friends inside of our home. They can play in the front yard and that is it. I don't know how to tackle this, or what to say when it's our “turn” to host our kids’ friends. I've been hosting the friends to movies, arcades, etc., but never in our home.
My husband is retired and ...Read more
Harriette Reflects On Changes In The New Year
DEAR READERS: Happy New Year! We are here at the beginning of a new page in the history of our lives. This can be an exciting time -- especially if you embrace it as a moment when possibilities stand before your eyes. Look through the lens of potential this year. What do you want for yourself and for your loved ones? Pause to reflect on all of ...Read more
Alternative To Hollering 'housekeeping!'
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am the janitor at a truck stop. What is the best way for me (a man) to announce myself when entering the women's restroom to clean it?
I start with calling out, "Hello. Janitor. Is anyone in here?" but it just doesn't sound right. Some ladies say nothing in response, and if I didn't look under all the stall doors, I would ...Read more
Progress Over Perfection in the New Year
Dear Readers: As we step into the new year, pause to honor the journey traveled and embrace the endless possibilities ahead. Each January brings a quiet promise -- an invitation to start fresh, to grow and to live more fully. Approach that promise with open hearts and gentle determination.
The new year often tempts us to aim for perfection --...Read more
Greetings Of Hope And Health To Begin A New Year
DEAR READERS: Welcome to 2025. A New Year has arrived; the last one is safely behind us. As always, this New Year brings with it our hopes for a new beginning.
Today presents an opportunity to discard destructive old habits for healthy new ones, and with that in mind, I will share Dear Abby's often-requested list of New Year's Resolutions -- ...Read more
Should we have 'the talk'? When? How?
Question: “I have been dating someone for three months, and we’re exclusive (not seeing other people). I’m ready to define the relationship (DTR) but don’t want to lose him if he’s not ready. How to have the talk?”
My response:
“For better or for worse (and I hope better, of course!), that's a risk you're going to have to take. I...Read more
Asking Eric: Sisters use pets as excuse for never visiting
Dear Eric: For about 20 years, my husband and I and our two boys, when they were younger, plus a dog, traveled usually by car to visit my sisters. They never visited us. The drive to their state was 14 hours long and was not fun or cheap, but we did it mostly because of my elderly mother who couldn't travel (lived with one sister). I have a fear...Read more
New Job Brings Imposter Syndrome And Self-Doubt
DEAR HARRIETTE: After passing the job final interview at one of the biggest companies in the United States, I've been struggling with imposter syndrome. Although I was chosen for this role because of my experience and skills, I can't shake the feeling that I'm not good enough. I worry about making mistakes or being "found out." To address this, ...Read more
Get Over It: Most Brides Wear White
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a close friend who is getting married, for the third time, later this year. In between her marriages, she has had lengthy relationships with other men.
I'm OK with all of that, except for one thing: She is treating this third marriage and its ceremony as if it's her first. She is planning on wearing a traditional white...Read more
Somatic Therapy Could Help With Trauma
Dear Annie: I'm a 45-year-old male and have had many traumatic events in my past, including abuses too bad to name. My problem is, as I was growing up, I was so mistreated that I never learned how to feel. I had to suppress everything I was feeling and disconnect from my emotions and body to survive.
Now that I'm grown and have been seeking ...Read more
Good Electrician Energized By Harassment Of Client
DEAR ABBY: I am a widow of two decades who has raised a family in an old historic home in a small island town. In the course of renovating and maintaining the home, a father-and-son electrician team have been like family.
During the past year or so, the dad, who is in his late 70s (older than I am) has started making unwanted romantic overtures...Read more