Friends Squirm Out Of Plans They Agreed To
DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I, along with a few family friends, needed to travel to Canada for a funeral. We decided it would be more economical to drive, so I booked the rental vehicle. Our friends let us know that they'd send us their contribution before we hit the road. The day before our departure, they called, saying they might just take a bus because it's more affordable, despite us choosing the rental car together and agreeing on pricing. My wife and I decided to invite them to join us in the carpool anyway because the car was already paid for, but I found all the back and forth to be a nuisance; we had checked in with them every step of the way, and we had all agreed. I ended up doing all the driving and covered gas, tolls and the cost of the car. My wife wants to say something to our friends, but I think that may be awkward. What do you think? -- Carpool
DEAR CARPOOL: Emotions were likely high, given that you and your friends were going to a funeral, but your friends were wrong. They broke an agreement that you made together and took advantage of you by not contributing at all to the cost of the trip. They should be ashamed of themselves! You have every right to speak to them about this. Remind them that you all agreed on the travel plans and the sharing of costs. They reneged. When you offered to let them ride with you anyway, they should have at least contributed to gas and tolls. Too bad you didn't ask them straight up to pay their share anyway. You can tell them now how you feel and ask for them to make a contribution to defray some of the costs.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm an executive assistant with 12 years of experience under my belt. I have been with my current company for the past three years, exhibiting growth and leadership, and I've even been trusted to conduct interviews and training for new hires. I was originally hired to be an assistant for a director at my company. Early this year, one of the C-suite execs lost their assistant, and I was asked to pull that weight and offer full-time support along with my existing workload. It has been difficult, but honestly, I've enjoyed the challenge. Working with the C-suite can be difficult, and it has been, but I enjoy learning through a different lens in the company. Despite enjoying this new role, I believe my efforts are worthy of proper compensation. This new role alone often makes anywhere between $20,000 and $30,000 more than I am currently earning, and I am handling both jobs. How do I remind my higher-ups of my value at the firm and respectfully request a well-deserved raise? -- Two Jobs in One
DEAR TWO JOBS IN ONE: Do you have a mentor at work? If so, talk to that person about strategy. If not, request a meeting with your direct supervisor. Describe how you have been enjoying the challenge over the past few months. Share what your long-term goals are at the company. Don't be afraid to dream big out loud. Ask what they are thinking about for the future of this role. Point out that you have been doing two jobs for several months and would appreciate being compensated for the additional role as you also hope they will consider you for a role that is in alignment with your vision.
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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Copyright 2025, Harriette Cole
COPYRIGHT 2025 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.
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