ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom's friend is on the hunt for a nice wife for his son and thinks I'd be a great fit. This matchmaker is an older man I know from church, but I've never met his son before. My mom asked if I'd be open to hanging out with him and his family just to meet the son and see how I feel. I thought it would be awkward to say no and ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister "Ruth" and I were both supposed to help a friend settle into her new home, but Ruth backed out after getting a last-minute invite to brunch. Our plans to help our friend had been scheduled long in advance. Ruth's SUV was packed with furniture and other items that we were expected to bring over, so she asked if she could...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a woman in my early 20s, just starting out in my career and trying to get my footing financially. My older sister, who's in her late 20s, recently accepted a new job in Missouri and is planning to move soon, but she doesn't have the money to make it happen. Now my parents and sister are pressuring me to cover her moving costs...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my friends is newly engaged! I was over the moon for her when I heard that her partner had proposed. The next time I saw her, I congratulated her and showered her with joy. She seemed coy and a bit reserved about it -- it was almost as if she was surprised that I knew, but I didn't think much of it at the time.

It's been ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Before my boyfriend and I were an item, he and his childhood crush dated for almost 10 years and had two children together. Eventually they parted ways, and she moved out west. Since they grew up together, he is still close with her family.

A few days ago, his ex's mother called and invited him to her birthday party. He told me ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I overheard my girlfriend on the phone with someone discussing an important work event she was meant to attend. Her colleague, whom I've met a few times, said they'd given her a plus one and mentioned that my girlfriend would probably want to have me there, too. To my surprise, she denied the need for a plus one, saying that I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am struggling right now, emotionally and financially. My tenants haven't paid their rent in months! I try to remain passive about it, as I am relying on the legal system to settle this issue, but my son is infuriated. Every day we see our tenants get dressed, head to work, bring home groceries, order takeout, host guests and ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Throughout my entire pregnancy, my mom treated me badly. I was 18 when I found out I was pregnant, and she was not happy. Not only was I not married, but I wasn't in a particularly stable relationship either. She held a grudge, probably out of shame or embarrassment. She barely spoke to me, and when she did, she was not kind.

...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom has always been emotionally distant, and now that I'm an adult, I'm realizing just how much that's shaped our relationship. Growing up, she wasn't unkind. She made sure we were fed, clothed and cared for, but she rarely showed affection or talked about feelings. If I ever brought up something emotional or difficult, she ...Read more

DEAR READERS: Many of you may know that I rarely use this space to make personal statements. I am writing today to tell you that my mother, Doris Irene Freeland Cole, has passed away at age 95. Many of you may have already experienced the loss of your mother, while plenty more continue to be blessed with a mother ready to share wisdom, love and ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm working as a nanny for a family I really enjoy. The position has been a good fit. The child is wonderful, the hours are manageable and I've developed a positive relationship with the rest of family. However, there's one issue that's starting to create some stress for me: Part of my responsibilities include driving the child ...Read more

DEAR HARIETTE: I'm currently caught in a battle between my sister and my wife. My sister is getting married soon and, unfortunately, does not want my wife to attend. My sister has always been rather protective or defensive of me, but about a year ago, after taking a trip together, my sister decided that she thinks my wife is self-centered. At ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family and I are gearing up for our annual family vacation. My oldest child is in a relationship and has been badgering me about wanting to bring his girlfriend. I would prefer not to bring her along on an intimate weeklong trip because I feel that her clothing can be rather revealing, and she doesn't seem shy about PDA. I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Over the past few years, I've been fortunate enough to do well in my career and build some financial stability for myself. I'm proud of how far I've come, especially because my sibling and I grew up without much, and I know how hard it is to break out of that cycle. The problem is, my sibling seems to resent me for it. Lately, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my co-workers keeps going to my boss about every little thing he thinks I'm doing "wrong" -- even when it's something minor, subjective or easily fixable. It feels like he's constantly monitoring me, waiting for any small mistake or oversight, and instead of coming to me directly, he escalates it to my supervisor. This has...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I had an intense relationship with a special man for nearly a year, and then he ghosted me. A few months later, he came back, but it has never been the same. He claims that his life is complicated right now, which includes him being out of work. I told him I could deal with that -- for a while, at least -- if he was attentive in ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a newish mom. My daughter is approaching her first birthday, but I still feel like a newbie. Learning all the tricks of motherhood has been a whirlwind, but something I didn't expect to be so hard is the shift I've been feeling in so many of my adult relationships. I am the only one from my immediate friend group who is a ...Read more

DEAR HARIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been dating for about two months now, and while things started off really strong, there's something that's been bothering me more and more: He refuses to show me where he lives. It feels intentional and calculated. Every time I've brought it up, he dodges the question or gives a vague excuse. The first time...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my best friends came to town. We've known each other since college and have seen each other through a lot of chapters. I don't feel like I'm in the best season of my life right now. I think I'm on my way to something great, but the detour has been filled with a lot of challenges, losses, hardships and so much more. My ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My roommate works out at 5 a.m. every day, which means that his alarm goes off at 4:30 a.m., and it's been affecting my sleep in a major way. The noise alone is enough to jolt me out of my sleep, and by the time I finally manage to fall back to sleep, it's almost time for me to get up for work.

I've tried everything I can think ...Read more