ArcaMax

DEAR READERS: Do you think being me is easy? Do you think being behind a computer much of the day -- pounding out advice meant to be helpful -- is all fun and games? Well, think again. Just recently, some pretty strong stuff came my way from online readers (creators.com) who were simply delighted to have a chance to vent. Their reactions follow. But first, the letter that lit the fire:

"I'd like to explain the reason women seem to have little interest in nice guys. It's not that 'nice' turns them off. It's just that the kind of guys women do want know they don't have to be nice. First, we must agree that the traits women care about most are physical appearance and financial stability. Let's not argue about that; we all know it's true, and any woman who disagrees is lying. A handsome guy with money may actually be nice, but he soon learns he doesn't have to be. Women will obviously hate me for saying this, because it implies they're superficial. Well, they are, just like men. The problem is that women won't admit that their failure to find good guys is their own doing. They prefer to blame it all on men and a lack of available nice guys. It's easier that way. So, ladies, stop pretending that you want a nice guy, as if 'nice' were the most important quality, when you really want a hot guy with a fat wallet who happens to be nice, in that order. -- Jon"

Reader reactions, in no particular order:

"Jon is definitely wrong. I used to date only hot rich men, when I was in my 20s. Now I'm in my early 40s, twice divorced. And I have the best boyfriend ever. He is nice to me, is considerate, talks to me for hours and does hundreds of small things that add up to one big happiness party. I look about 10 years younger than I am, and I'm still considered hot. My man? He's 19 years older than I am, 2 inches shorter and about 30 pounds overweight. I think he's hot because he's such a nice guy! I swore off hot guys with money because they almost always cheat, and I got tired of fighting off other women he led on because they stoked his ego."

"Susan, the typical woman not only doesn't want a nice guy but also will use a man's niceness against him as one more reason to show him the door. Jon is 100 percent right, and you couldn't be more wrong in saying nice guys just need a chance."

"Women just want to complain. It's really tough for women to find good men because all they want to do is push them away and look for a bad boy."

Joseph Campbell defines love as friendship set to music. Think about it.

Have a question for Susan? You can reach her directly at susan@single-file.com. We've uncovered another treasure trove of "Single File" paperbacks - in perfect condition, signed by Susan, ready to enjoy. Send $15 and your address: Susan Deitz, C/O Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.