ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, my daughter asked me to tell her more about my early life. Over the years, I've made a point not to talk much about it, but now that she's older and asking, I think it's OK to share. When she asked me, I started off by explaining that I've never told her about my past because I didn't have a happy childhood. The words ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Strangers want to make small talk with me while waiting in grocery checkout lines, at bus stops, at the bank, during flights, etc. I do not want to make friends with strangers every time I step outside my house.

When this happens, I can't bring myself to tell these people, "I'm sorry, but I don't really want to talk," because...Read more

Dear Annie: I've always been someone who struggles between my head and my heart. I see things that I want so badly and my heart aches for them, but I know better when those things don't mesh well with my life. Like denying my favorite piece of chocolate cake because it's bad for my diet.

Normally, this is one of my best traits. I was very ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are raising our 7-month-old daughter together, and we generally get along well. I love him very much, but he has a habit that worries me. He's constantly on the lookout for a new job. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but every couple of months he says he's bored and wants to work somewhere else. These are decent-...Read more

Again and again, my mind returns to the letters I receive from women discouraged and frustrated in their relationships with men. Recently, when I was thinking about a photo I had seen of Gloria Steinem in softly curled tresses, the letters and the photo jelled and became an insight: The chief exponent of female equality was urging her flock ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 14-year-old daughter's best friend gets jealous of my daughter when she spends time with other friends, even though her best friend has other friends as well. If my daughter hangs out with classmates, teammates or family friends, her best friend becomes mean toward my daughter when she finds out. Sometimes she makes rude ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a freelance journalist who has been living, off and on, in the private room of a hostel off the beaten path. I love the place because it's gorgeous and usually has excellent vibes, but there are basically 15 of us keeping it in business. It is unfortunately quite close to a war zone.

Anyway, the most recent time I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I want to go to trade school, but my parents don't approve. They want me to enroll full-time at a traditional four-year college, but that's not what I want to do. My parents worry that I'll limit my future or miss out on opportunities if I don't follow the path they envision. I know they want what's best for me, but I feel ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I think the reason that people think using "ma'am" or "sir" is offensive stems from the idea that you have to assume someone's gender identity in order to use them.

There are many people whose appearance doesn't match their identity. Assuming one knows that information based on looks, or even voice, can cause distress for ...Read more

Dear Annie: I've been happily married for more than 40 years. The one shadow on that happiness has been my relationship with my husband's family, especially my mother-in-law. From the beginning, she has never seemed to like me. I honestly do not know why. Over the years, she has been dismissive and unkind, and I have usually stayed quiet to ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship for seven years. My significant other, "Gabe," and I bought a home together. We are also raising three of his grandsons. I pay half of the mortgage, utilities, food, maintenance and personal necessities. We both pay for our own insurance, car loans and gas.

Abby, there are four of them and one of me. ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in a nice apartment building in Los Angeles, and it costs a lot of money to live here. Since I pay such a premium, you would think that my neighbors would all be respectful. However, my upstairs neighbor plays music so loud all the time, I can still hear his music at 2 a.m. I've asked him to turn down the music many times,...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am getting married in a traditional church ceremony. My father, who will be giving me away, has refused to wear a tuxedo on the grounds that it is a "monkey suit," even though all of the other men in the wedding party will be wearing one.

I gave in, because I want him to be happy and comfortable. Now he says he will not ...Read more

Dear Annie: My best friend and I have been close since college. He is the person who helped me move into my first apartment, who showed up with coffee during finals, who still remembers the name of my childhood dog. That is why it hurts so much to watch him repeat the same pattern that already cost him almost everything.

Years ago, his ...Read more