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Millenial Life: Improvising Our Way to Courage
Some fear rarely announces itself. It moves quietly, almost politely, and takes a chair in the corner of your chest and waits. Some days, I forget it is there. Other days, it stirs the cauldron of my stomach until I'm forced to account for it.
For most of my life, I believed bravery belonged to people who felt certain. Heroes in stories seemed ...Read more
Asking Eric: Years after active addiction, family remains distant
Dear Eric: I've just turned 40 this past year. The last 15 years I was in a horrible drug addiction. I lied and hurt and did terrible things to a lot of people, especially my family.
About eight years ago they officially disowned me. Understandable.
I've cleaned up and got my act together six years ago. At first, I tried to force my way back ...Read more
Setting Boundaries With My Stepson
Dear Annie: My stepson is 22 and autistic. For 12 years, he lived with us half the time and with his mother the other half. During those years, I was very involved in his life -- I went into his classroom to help with his needs, drove him to school and appointments, took him shopping and spent time just hanging out with him. I truly tried to ...Read more
Teacher Has A Message For Parents At School Year's End
DEAR ABBY: I am a teacher. I love my job, and I love my students. However, as I near the end of my 26th year of teaching, there's something I need to get off my chest. At the end of every school year, many parents ask me to write a personal note to their student as an inscription in a certain children's book. They request this of all of their ...Read more
Asking Eric: Daughter-in-law’s Friendsgiving overshadows family dinner
Dear Eric: My daughter-in-law decided a few years back to have a Friendsgiving dinner which she hosts a couple of weekends before Thanksgiving. She invites her family (as her mom has never done Thanksgiving) and then a bunch of her and my son's friends.
In my mind I know this shouldn't bother me, but it does. I waited my "turn" growing up and ...Read more
Friend's Comments About Daughter Cross The Line
DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend and I were talking recently, and she made a comment about my daughter that caught me off guard. It wasn't outright cruel, but it was insensitive: She implied that my daughter was "a lot to handle" and hinted that her behavior made it difficult for people to be around her. I know kids can be overwhelming at times, and I'...Read more
Christmas Lists: Baby's First Gift Registry?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Just after Thanksgiving each year, my young nieces send out a letter to the extended family that contains their "Letter to Santa," outlining the things they would like as gifts.
Sometimes the letters are very cute. My husband and his siblings grew up with these letters as a tradition, and I don't mind receiving them.
What I ...Read more
The Social Weight of a Plate
Dear Annie: I have a good friend "Amy," who is a great lady. We've known each other for about 15 years, but we reconnected about two years ago and started attending events together, including dinners that range from casual to fine dining. We're both in our late 40s and single. She's a mom of three almost-grown adults who she raised without her...Read more
Pitch-A-Friend wants you to be the wingmate
MINNEAPOLIS -- Dressed in “Team Lisa” T-shirts, two friends posing as savvy business-minded “Sharks” ran through a tight presentation of why any potential investor in the audience would be smart to date their friend.
“When you invest in Lisa you invest in your own future,” they said, as part of their “Shark Tank”-themed ...Read more
Asking Eric: Gift exchange tradition grows tiresome
Dear Eric: How does one politely suggest to an in-law's relative that we don't need to exchange Christmas gifts? My significant other and I are at the stage in life where we really do not need more "stuff" and would rather not deal with gifts that are generic at best and usually are re-gifted promptly via donation or gift-economy communities.
...Read more
Bring Your Own Everything
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I received an invitation for a work-sponsored event. The invitation states: "To help us minimize our environmental footprint and make cleanup easier, we kindly ask that you bring your own silverware, plate and beverage container."
So, when I arrive, I will be toting a plate, some silverware (not sure if I will need a knife or...Read more
Tired of Being Outdone
Dear Annie: I love my sister dearly, but she's one of those people who always has to top everyone's story. If I mention I had a bad cold, she'll say hers turned into pneumonia. If I get a compliment at work, she'll mention a big promotion she got years ago. Family gatherings have become exhausting because every conversation somehow circles ...Read more
Wife Carries On Communicating With Former Best Friend
DEAR ABBY: My best friend of more than 10 years, "Ian," ghosted me! We used to talk about everything -- wives, children, jobs. We spent hours together and helped each other sort out our problems. He knew more about me than my wife. With no explanation, he stopped responding to texts and messages and is ignoring my calls. I have come to terms ...Read more
Asking Eric: Acquaintance is friendly in real life but ignores on Facebook
Dear Eric: I have a friend I've known for four years. We all live in a 55+ community and have moved here from different areas of the country. We are a group of women who get together on a regular basis for outings.
Over the past couple of months, I feel somewhat left out because of a couple of events I wasn't included in. But what I'm trying to...Read more
Cheap Friends Won't Stop Complaining About Prices
DEAR HARRIETTE: Two of my friends are extremely cheap, and it's getting to the point where it's hard to enjoy doing anything with them. We all live in New York City, and as you know, the cost of simply existing here is high. Yet they complain about every price tag, subway fare or coffee that costs more than $3, even splitting an Uber when it's ...Read more
The Straightforward 'ouch' Is A Classic For A Reason
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at the head of a line to vote; the precinct wasn't crowded, and no one's wait was long. The precinct volunteer encountered a problem that prompted her to seek help, and I spent my wait looking at the floor rather than staring in her direction, not wanting her to misinterpret my gaze as annoyance (the wait was no big deal...Read more
Caught Between Sister and Aunt
Dear Annie: My sister, "Ellen," has an extensive history of being the victim of sexual abuse, which has caused her a lot of trauma. I'm so proud of all the work she has done to process and work through much of this. However, she tends to have very skewed and strong views on most things. We often see situations, past and present, in almost ...Read more
Argumentative, Abusive Brother Alienates Family
DEAR ABBY: I have a brother who is very opinionated and in my face any time I don't agree with him. It doesn't matter what the subject is; he thinks he's the only one who knows anything about it. He is not educated, but he thinks he's smarter than everyone else, even educated people.
He won't let me get a word in while he's yelling and ...Read more
Ask Anna: How do I tell if a guy is moving slowly or wasting my time?
Dear Anna,
I’m 28 and have been seeing a guy around my age for a few months. We clicked fast in conversation — texting every day and even saying good night, sharing long voice notes, that kind of early-stage excitement — but because of work and conflicting schedules, we’ve only managed a handful of actual dates.
Last week was my ...Read more
Single File: Core Questions (Part 3)
You've reached the last of the survey's core questions, but this is no finale. Next week highlights lifestyle-related questions and responses. Let's dive back in.
--Are you or do you plan to be sexually faithful to your partner? (About 39 percent said yes.)
--Has your sex life as a single person lived up to your expectations?
--Does ...Read more
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