ArcaMax

Continuing on this most important issue for the ladies -- defensiveness -- I'm asking you to observe yourself the next time you're with a man. Are you tense, on the edge of your seat, afraid he'll try to jump your bones? My nationwide survey found that men -- most of them, anyway -- do not expect sex on the first several dates. Could it be that ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, I spent a weekend with friends my husband and I met on the beach a few years ago. We all really liked each other, so it felt natural to invite them to stay with us one weekend when a lot of mutual friends were gathering since they didn't have a beach rental this year. It was great spending time with these new friends, ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have seen a close relative in the news for something nefarious. I know they must be upset by the reports, and I sincerely feel bad for them, as I know this action was out of character.

Should I acknowledge the incident and comfort them, or just ignore the whole thing? I want to let them know things will be OK, but don't ...Read more

Dear Annie: I am caught in a very difficult family situation. I have twin sisters-in-law, Tricia and Tanya, who have not spoken to each other in more than 25 years. To complicate things further, Tanya and her mother have also been estranged for 24 years.

I've managed to maintain good relationships with both sisters, but things have come to a ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My brother "Joey" married a woman, "Allie," who is mentally unstable. Every couple of months, she loses her temper at me or one of my family members. It's extremely disruptive and upsetting. She has been diagnosed with type 1 bipolar disorder as well as borderline personality disorder. Joey recognizes her behavior is inappropriate but...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently in the middle of a career pivot. For many years, I worked in corporate offices behind the scenes in operations. I still do that now in a more creative industry. In this role, I get to show my personal interests, style and creative capabilities a lot more. As a result, a lot of people have been telling me that I ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A few months ago, I met a man on a singles website and we began dating. Things seem to be progressing nicely between us until he blurted out that he was married.

He explained that he hoped we would continue to see each other anyway, because we got along so well. He said he'd never lied to me by telling me he was single, and ...Read more

Dear Annie: I have lived in my house for more than 40 years. In all that time, I have done my best to be a good neighbor. I am not the type to throw block parties or socialize regularly, but I have always made a point to wave, say hello and keep a friendly atmosphere on our street. Until recently, that was enough to maintain a peaceful, ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have a special-needs son and cannot travel with him alone. I have also been in a committed relationship for two years. When my aunt's youngest daughter got married last year, I clearly stated that I would not be able to attend because of these limitations. Now her son is getting married. The family sent out an electronic invitation ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I don't think my sister and brother-in-law are doing a good job of raising their two daughters, who are 10 and 12. Whenever I visit, I notice the girls are often left to their own devices with little guidance or discipline. They talk back to adults, spend hours glued to their phones or tablets, and don't seem to have boundaries ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it wrong not to give feedback?

I am expected to "like," whether virtually or in person, every little thing seen, done or eaten by my friends. Every item I buy and every service I use, I am asked, "How're we doing?"

I don't mind this if I have a real opinion, good or bad. But for most of it, I just don't give a (bleep).

...Read more

Dear Annie: I often see letters in your column from mothers-in-law with various complaints about their daughters-in-law. The themes are familiar: "She never invites me to activities." "She doesn't take pictures of me with the baby." "She won't let me see my grandchild."

What I find myself wondering is: Why is all of the frustration directed ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My best friend "Pat" and I live on opposite sides of the country. I am very concerned about Pat's daughter and granddaughter, "Mandy." Pat's son-in-law is verbally abusive. He calls Pat's daughter names and tells Mandy that Mommy is bad. Mandy is only 3 and already knows she has to be nice to Daddy so he doesn't yell at Mommy.

Pat's ...Read more

There's a difference between doing something and doing it right. You can check a box, sign your name, make the announcement, and hold the press conference. But that's not the same as solving a problem. And too often these days, we're watching leaders choose the performance of action over the practice of responsibility.

Doing it right doesn't ...Read more