Life Advice
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Neatnik's Patience In Cluttered Home Nears Its End
DEAR ABBY: I am neat and organized, but my wife is the opposite. She's messy and disorganized. I knew it before we married, but we made a handshake deal that she'd make an effort to pick up after herself once we moved in together. Unfortunately, it hasn't happened.
Every time she comes home, whatever she's carrying gets dropped on the nearest ...Read more
Asking Eric: Friendship with father’s best friend becomes a burden
Dear Eric: I'm not sure what to do about my deceased father's best friend. My father’s friend is currently 86 years old. I had hoped that he could fill me in on who my father was. My father was barely in my life; he left my brother and I with a horribly abusive mother.
Well, this gentleman "Hank" will take anything that I say and one-ups me. ...Read more
After Moving In, Son Becomes Dismissive To Family
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently welcomed my adult son into my home. I didn't know him as he was growing up; I learned about him when he was already 18, and since then we've stayed in touch through visits, calls and texts. When his mother passed away, he asked to move in with me. My wife and daughters supported the decision, and he's been living with ...Read more
Many Ways To Thank Heroic Colleagues
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I had a choking incident at the office today when I inhaled a cherry tomato.
One of my direct reports did the Heimlich maneuver and helped loosen it, and then one of the guys from another department joined in to keep the tomato moving. As I recovered, a secretary from down the hall put a cold compress on my neck and forehead....Read more
Dear Annie: Friend-Zoned and Feeling Confused
Dear Annie: I'm a 32-year-old single woman facing a predicament. I've been friends with a guy named "Stan" for a few months, though we haven't actually talked in over a month now. We were acquainted in high school, but we lost touch after a short while. Stan and I went on a couple of dates, and I thought things were going well, but then he asked...Read more
Young Girl's Presence At Playground Raises Serious Questions
DEAR ABBY: To help out his parents, I pick up my grandson from day care two days a week. I recently started taking him to a local park for about 45 minutes before I take him home. I'm physically active and climb the slides, chase him around and play with him. He loves our time together.
Over the last two weeks, there has been a little 6-year-...Read more
Asking Eric: Dance student wants to advance without insulting instructor
Dear Eric: I have been taking dance classes from the same instructor for years. There are a number of us students who would like to see more technique, as opposed (or in addition) to more steps, taught as some dance styles rely heavily on technique (West Coast Swing is an example).
We really enjoy the classes and the instructor's commitment to ...Read more
Mom Wants To Protect Daughter With Vitiligo
DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter has vitiligo and is adjusting to the changes in her skin and hair. She's only 7 years old, and as most of us know, kids can be insensitive. Some of her classmates can be judgmental, so it's been an uphill battle reminding her how beautiful she is, and that the differences in her appearance don't make her any different...Read more
No Winners In Grocery-Aisle Skirmish
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at a store with narrow aisles. I turned down an aisle that had two women with carts. The first woman I encountered completely ignored me, so I gently pushed my cart past. The second woman was older, in her 60s or 70s, and asked if I would like to get through.
Thinking she was being courteous, I smiled and said, "Yes, ...Read more
Dear Annie: Confronting a Loved One With an Eating Disorder
Dear Annie: My husband confided to me that his mother had an eating disorder in the past, and there are possible signs she may have relapsed. When she visits us, she will exercise for hours daily, regularly disparage her physical appearance and skip meals claiming that she is "too bloated" to eat. I'm never sure what is the best way to respond ...Read more
Couple's Relationship Has Withered On The Vine
DEAR ABBY: I am a senior woman in great shape. I am active, and I have never had a problem attracting men. Five years ago, I married a man I had known for many years. We used to have a pretty active sex life, but it has been four years since he has touched me in an intimate way. He says he doesn't know why, and that it is due to lack of ...Read more
Ask Anna: Is it healthy for couples to need space from each other every day?
Dear Anna,
My girlfriend and I have been together for four years, and we’re constantly fighting about alone time. We both work full time but on different schedules. When she gets home from work, she immediately disappears into the bedroom for at least an hour — sometimes longer — to “decompress.” She insists this isn’t personal and ...Read more
Asking Eric: Deaf sister excluded by brothers
Dear Eric: I am the youngest of four and the only girl. I happen to be deaf (I speak and read lips). It's always been a challenge communicating with the whole family. Often the conversation feels like watching a ping-pong game and I often miss snippets of conversations and jokes.
My oldest brother got married to a woman who has a teenage ...Read more
Friend Misremembers Giving Away Pants
DEAR READERS: A couple of years ago, a friend of mine lent me a pair of pants. Soon after the occasion, I stopped by to visit her and totally forgot to bring her pants with me. I admitted my mistake, and then she told me I could keep them because they don't fit her well. A few days ago, she reached out asking for her pants, and when I made a ...Read more
Can I Tell My Young Co-Workers They Have Bad Manners?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I frequently attend team lunches and dinners with my immediate department members, both supervisors and associates. These dining experiences are mostly personal affairs and come after a week of hard teamwork.
We work in an industry where we will be in one location for a few months, and then move on to another city. We all get...Read more
Dear Annie: Aftermath of Dating a Narcissist
Dear Annie: After dating a guy who turned out to be a narcissist, my question is, how can I heal? I've tried everything, and I've even felt like I'm over it and I'm OK, but then I have my days. It's like grieving.
I fell in love with this man, and feel like I let my guard down way too soon, only to be disappointed. Yes, he pursued me heavily, ...Read more
Brother-In-Law's New Squeeze Is A Familiar Face
DEAR ABBY: Please help me move forward. My brother-in-law is dating a woman my husband was intimate with once before we were married. It makes family functions very awkward for me, but most of the family sees it as the past. It was the past, but it is now in our faces. My husband feels the same way.
Do we just keep the peace and stay away from ...Read more
Single File: Be Good to Yourself
This is more than an exercise; this is a commandment! You absolutely must make being good to yourself a daily event. And very few people, even those closest to you, can even begin to know what that means; even that inner circle can't read your mind. No, only you can give yourself what you need to grow and thrive. But now that I've got your ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: Is there a 'right' amount of time to have been single?
A new batch of questions, and a new batch of answers!
Q: When is it time to ask about how long someone has been single and whether they have been married before? In person or still in the app before meeting?
A: I have a question for you: What are you hoping to garner from this information? Is there a "right" amount of time for someone to have ...Read more
Asking Eric: Stepmother unsure about giving quarrelsome stepson inheritance
Dear Eric: My husband and I have been married 31 years. We each have two children of our own. They are all grown.
His boys have different mothers; I raised one and helped with the younger one. As soon as the younger one became an adult, the problems began. Around holidays he starts picking fights, stirring trouble, spreading rumors. Then ...Read more
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