ArcaMax

DEAR ABBY: I see a psychiatrist and psychologist for generalized anxiety disorder, major depression disorder and borderline personality disorder. According to my doctors, my psychiatric disorders are a result of the 44 years of abuse I received from my mother, as well as the abuse she allowed others to inflict on me.

Her physical abuse stopped ...Read more

DEAR SUSAN: I've been reading a lot of letters in your column about child support. How about a kid's perspective? My dad never sees me. Why should I want to see him? He owes my siblings and me thousands of dollars' worth of food, clothing, medical treatment, etc. I'm not complaining about apartments that don't have carpet or having to watch ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Throughout my entire pregnancy, my mom treated me badly. I was 18 when I found out I was pregnant, and she was not happy. Not only was I not married, but I wasn't in a particularly stable relationship either. She held a grudge, probably out of shame or embarrassment. She barely spoke to me, and when she did, she was not kind.

...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a dear friend who occasionally attends functions with me where food is available -- usually breakfasts. She invariably takes an item (a bagel, muffin or cookie, say), breaks off the amount she wants and then puts the remainder back on the serving platter.

I think this is wrong, as she's touching the food with bare ...Read more

Dear Annie: I'm an only child in my early 40s, and I'm at my wits' end trying to care for my 74-year-old mother. She lives alone and insists she's "just fine," but I can see she's slipping -- physically, mentally and emotionally. She has high blood pressure, diabetes and serious arthritis, but she won't stay on her medications. She hasn't been...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My late husband and I were married 38 years when we finally went to marriage counseling. I found out then that he had slept with my sister early in our marriage. I had suspected he'd also had an affair with his uncle's wife. (They were very close in age.) This, too, was confirmed in counseling.

My sister was recently home because of ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom has always been emotionally distant, and now that I'm an adult, I'm realizing just how much that's shaped our relationship. Growing up, she wasn't unkind. She made sure we were fed, clothed and cared for, but she rarely showed affection or talked about feelings. If I ever brought up something emotional or difficult, she ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My son is graduating with honors from a very selective university. My husband wants to invite family from both sides to attend, which would require everyone to travel out of state to a very expensive city.

Initially, we were going to host a nice party after the ceremony. Now it's completely off, due to volatility in my ...Read more

Dear Annie: I've been with my boyfriend for over three years. We met when I was a freshman in high school and he was a sophomore. I fell head over heels right away, and we became official nearly a year later. Over time, I learned about his painful childhood -- absent father, a mother who had him young and has since moved away, a hostile ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: We asked our 19-year-old college daughter, "Lulu," to dog-sit and housesit sit several months ago. She knew our rule of no visitors allowed in our home while we were out of town. Because of this, we didn't feel we needed to prepare the house by filing mail and documents away prior to our short trip.

Lulu had her new boyfriend of a ...Read more

DEAR READERS: Many of you may know that I rarely use this space to make personal statements. I am writing today to tell you that my mother, Doris Irene Freeland Cole, has passed away at age 95. Many of you may have already experienced the loss of your mother, while plenty more continue to be blessed with a mother ready to share wisdom, love and ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My child's school is having a staff appreciation week, which isn't a bad idea, given the effort they put in and how they enhance our kids' lives. What strikes me as extremely gauche, however, is that it's organized and run by the school, while asking parents to contribute.

This seems like the kind of thing that parents should...Read more

Dear Annie: I never thought I would be in this position, but I have become estranged from my adult daughter. We used to be incredibly close. When she was younger, we had long talks late into the night, and we would laugh until we cried on road trips. I was there for every heartbreak, every success, and I truly believed we had a bond that would...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have been married 10 years. My husband is from another country, and the last six years haven't been easy. I've been the sole provider for our family, on the advice of our lawyer, while we were getting his paperwork complete (my husband refused to work illegally). I have stood by this man through thick and thin and endured his verbal...Read more

I had a frilly pink dress in second grade that I only wore a handful of times. There are some photos of me striking some sharp poses in our backyard, but after I outgrew that dress, I didn't follow up with any similarly typical frilly costumes of girlhood. As I grew, I went with comfort over style for a long time -- and some might say even to ...Read more

Dear Annie: I'm really struggling with how to handle my daughter's relationship. She's in her early 20s and is smart, funny and ambitious. I'm so proud of her. But I just can't seem to get behind her boyfriend.

He's not unkind, but he's ... aimless. He can't seem to hold down a steady job, he leans on her emotionally (and sometimes ...Read more