Life Advice
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Asking Eric: After wife’s death, widower is not ready for family visits yet
Dear Eric: My wife recently passed away and I am doing OK. Several of my wife's senior children keep wanting to come and visit me. How do I politely say no without hurting their feelings? When they have come before, I was stressed as to how to entertain them for a week. They think I am being helped by their visit but actually I would prefer ...Read more
Everyone's Therapist -- but Who Listens to Me?
Dear Annie: I enjoy reading your advice and hope you have some for me.
I've always been the person people come to with their problems. I'm told I'm a good listener, likely because of my own counseling journey. I often suggest therapy or AA to others, especially when addiction is involved.
I grew up in an abusive, alcoholic environment and ...Read more

Asking Eric: Mother of disabled son is tired of well-meaning advice
Dear Eric: My 30-year-old son is severely physically disabled due to a debilitating muscle disease. He requires 100 percent assistance with all life functions. He does not have any cognitive disabilities, is very intelligent and earned a bachelor's degree. My husband retired a couple of years ago and is his main caregiver.
People who are ...Read more
Boundaries Under One Roof
Dear Annie: My husband and I live in a three-bedroom house with our two grown children. Recently, our youngest daughter had a baby and moved back home -- bringing her boyfriend with her. We told her beforehand that he couldn't stay here, but they moved him in anyway. Now, the two of them -- and their baby -- are living out of her bedroom.
...Read more

Ask Anna: My boyfriend's fitness comments are hurting my self-esteem
Dear Anna,
I've been dating my boyfriend for two months, and while he's incredibly kind and caring, I'm struggling with something that's making me feel insecure. He regularly makes comments like “we should go to the gym together” or “when are you going to start going to the gym?” He works out multiple times a week, follows fitness ...Read more
Single File: Turn the Tables
Let's celebrate your singleness in a new way, making the celebration a family affair. After all, the most telling show of your enhanced pride will be with your parents, those people of a different generation who do their very best to understand yours. They may not always fully "get" the message in your undependence, but in the end, their ...Read more

Ask Dating Coach Erika: What if my match doesn't ask me any questions?
It happens all the time. You match with someone online. You ask a thoughtful question about their profile, and they respond… with no questions about you back. You try again with a question. They respond with no questions back. Now what?
I want to introduce a concept called 2QS, or Two Questions and a Statement.
Here’s how it works: Give ...Read more

Asking Eric: Sister gets short end of the stick from father’s estate
Dear Eric: My dad passed away three years ago. He lived about 10 hours away from me but near my sister.
Sis and Dad have always been close. I had an OK relationship with both of them, though she and I have never been close. She took on most of his care and I tried to visit a few times a year.
Dad had a paid-off house worth about $250,000. To ...Read more
Boundaries and Burnout
Dear Annie: I am almost 40 and trying to rebuild a healthier relationship with my dad. When I was a child, he was my hero, the person I looked up to and went to for advice. When I was about 10, he told me that I would probably have trouble getting along with him during my teenage years, but that things would get better when I became an adult. ...Read more

Asking Eric: After receiving financial support for years, daughter cuts parents off
Dear Eric: My husband and his siblings inherited a home. My daughter offered to move her family into one of the apartments and take care of the property. We decided on a figure that would cover the bills in the form of rent.
Several years ago, she began withholding rent, she would only pay when I would ask for additional money due to a large ...Read more
Not the Ring I Hoped For
Dear Annie: I've been with my loving partner, "Daniel," for six years. We're both in our 40s and have children from previous relationships. Our life together is generally very harmonious. We share responsibilities, enjoy spending time together and support one another deeply. We align on most values and have built a life that, in many ways, ...Read more

Asking Eric: Niece excludes one branch of large family tree at wedding
Dear Eric: My husband is one of eight siblings. A few live on opposite sides of the country, but they do remain in contact, and we all get together occasionally.
One of my brothers-in-law is married and has a stepdaughter.
The stepdaughter became engaged, and we were told that since she was paying for her own wedding, they had no say in the ...Read more
Feeling Forgotten
Dear Annie: I have always considered myself someone who values friendship deeply. I have many friends, at least on paper, but I have noticed something that has started to weigh heavily on me. I am almost always the one reaching out. If I do not initiate the call, text or invitation, days or even weeks go by in silence. It is rare that anyone ...Read more
Our House, in the Middle of the Street
There was a running joke with my in-laws that a compliment on cooking would be, "Well, now you can get married." This started after I began collecting the most exotic peppers at my Mexican grocery store, names I had never even heard of before, and threw them together in a blender with boiling water, chicken bouillon, and some cross-border, ...Read more

Asking Eric: Hearing loss struggles strain friendship
Dear Eric: I have two friends who can't hear very well. One of them had hearing aids but returned them. The other one has them but won't wear them.
They frequently talk over each other and interrupt people all the time because they can't seem to tell if someone else is speaking.
What's really annoying is they keep telling me to speak up, then ...Read more
A Friend in Quiet Crisis
Dear Annie: My best friend and I have been close for over 20 years. We've seen each other through marriages, divorces, parenting challenges, health scares -- you name it. She is the person I call when I'm heartbroken, when I'm celebrating or when I just need someone to remind me who I am.
Lately, though, she has been going through a rough ...Read more

Asking Eric: Mom wants relationship with adult sons without being overbearing
Dear Eric: I have two sons in their early 30s. Recently, my older son became engaged to a wonderful woman the same age, who I love as a daughter.
While our relationships are good, I have found that my desire for close family bonds has gotten stronger as I get older, especially in the past several years when I've been living several hours' ...Read more
Mortified by Marriage
Dear Annie: I've been with my girlfriend for seven years and lived with her for four. She wants to get married and have kids. For the past three years, I've promised to propose every six months, but when the time comes, I back out. I even went ring shopping but couldn't pull the trigger.
Although I want to get married and have kids one day, ...Read more

Asking Eric: Wife’s divorce shocks husband of 50 years
Dear Eric: My wife of 50 years told me that she no longer wants to live with me. I am currently living in our summer home with no friends or social contacts/networks. She has no interest in reconciling.
We didn't fight or argue, and I am at a loss as to what triggered her declaration. This has taken me totally by surprise. I thought we had a ...Read more
Husband Must Address Triggers
Dear Annie: My husband does not like my sister. He says she reminds him too much of his ex-wife. It has now come to the point where he doesn't want to be around her. This is making it very difficult to see my whole family. They live in Canada, and we are planning a trip there to visit them, seeing as my father's mental health is getting bad.
My...Read more
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